HHWW

HHWW a colloquial term fondly used by Filipinos to refer to couples who are Holding Hands While Walking. This gesture is, I think the simplest way to express love and/or to declare couple's "being together" to the public.

Aside from couples, parents also hold their child's hand in crossing the street, strolling in the park or mall and comforting them when they feel pain or feel scared. I remember when I was little, I am not-so-fond of going to the hospital because of... yes, you guessed it right- the most dreaded, injection. One time I got sick and they had to do a blood extraction to find out what was wrong. The nurse and medical technician couldn't calm me down as I refuse to be cooperative with the procedure. They were holding my arms so tight as if I was a criminal caught red handed and struggling to escape. Up to this day, I remember that scene vividly in mind and the only thing that made me feel safe and secure again was my mom holding my hand.

Hand holding and its many heartwarming effects could lead to stronger friendships and relationships. When you hold a friend's hand in grief, it could be worth more than the words you could ever utter to bring her/him comfort.

But sometimes when you are all alone and lonely, the only thing you can do is to hold your own hand. And there you'll realize, that you are in a perfect prayer position.

Let us not forget, behind all the glitter and the merriment of this season- Of hand holding and fun bonding, today is special because of Jesus.

Merry Christmas to you all! And have a more meaningful holidays through prayer.

"Two Hands" Gouache on Paper

Seat Stealers

I love watching theater!

It is totally a different experience every single time. I remember when I was a kid I watched "Ang Prinsipe at ang Buwan" (The prince & the moon). I can't seem to recall how the story ended but what I remember so vividly is how the villain character came out of the stage and scared all the little children including my then little-cutesey-patootsie self; it was absolutely hilarious!

As I was growing up I continued to patronize "teatro" And because I enjoyed each play I watched, I exposed my niece to it. Just recently, I brought her to yet another awesome play. It is the Filipino adaptation of Disney's The Little Mermaid Musical.

As we were waiting for the show to start we noticed that there are still a few seats in the middle of the orchestra. I wanted to move to have a better view but my niece stopped me. So I told her if the seats are still empty on the last 3 minute reminder, we'll move.

Just before the lights were turned off we transferred. After 15 minutes, 5 other people came in. They didn't bother to look at their seat numbers and sat down immediately. In short, I think we switched places with them without them knowing.

After the show, my niece being such a witty girl was teasing me that we were "seat stealers" and that we should be punished. I just smiled and told her that I didn't mean to do it.

On our way home, I remembered a quote that goes something like this "Most of the time the key to success is merely by showing up" I guess it would be much better if we add "...on time"

Odd as it may seem, even if I am wrong in the context of being honest in this situation. There are 2 things we ought to understand in getting what we want/deserve in this life 1) showing up is never enough 2) putting an effort to be on time or to do something about it, is always better. What happened to the ones who came in late can happen to anyone and to any situation. Just as you are waiting for that promotion someone else is doing the same thing or even better. Just as you thought you would never loose her love, someone else is there waiting for her to feel that she is taken for granted. And just as you are taking so much time to figure out what you really want to do in life, another year has passed.

Real life lessons can come from not-so-ideal situations to which our mind are not accustomed to see. I realized that everything happens for a reason. And the reason for me is to learn valuable life's lesson and share it with others.

Que Horror!

Driving in Metro Manila can sometimes really get into my nerves. There is a big difference now from the time when I started to learn how to drive. Before the problem wasj ust buses and jeeps loading and unloading wherever they please but now, we also have a lot of motorcycles. And they really don’t care if they are on the right lane as long as there’s still space. They counter flow, cut your lane and all sorts of ways and means to get ahead of you. It’s just crazy!

Have you ever wondered why we are like that? Why do we like to make “siksik”? (Sorry, as much as I try to refrain from sounding too “kolehiyala” -a college school girl here, I just can’t think of an exact English translation for the word right now) So have you ever wondered why? I have, many times in fact. Whenever I see people queuing at boarding gates I really don’t understand why almost everyone wants to be first when we all have assigned seats. Funnyisn’t it? In the malls people go where everybody is. At some food joints, we are likely attracted to go where there are a lot of people; believing they have really good food. When we’re with friends, we like to be so close to each other. The way we express ourselves almost always includes touching, tapping one’s shoulder, holding hands etc. I’m sure I am not the only one who has observed this around us. And I am sure you also have participated in queuing and squeezing in spaces one time or another. Don’t deny.

Human behavior is such an amazing phenomenon. The events I illustrated above actually are also reflected on Philippine art like painting. Try to search for photos of Philippine artworks. You will see that most Filipino painters fill the whole canvas with detail unlike Japanese art where the treatment is always minimal.This art form is often referred to as “Horror Vacui” or fear of empty spaces. I explained this concept to my half-Filipino friend who grew up in Europe for him to understand why people here don’t mind bumping into one another and why his Filipino relatives always give him a “high five” or tap his shoulders. Now he’s back in Italy and sure misses the warm touch and smiles only we can give.

Sometimes there are things around us that irritate us or make us feel so annoyed. It is so easy to say that there is something wrong to what we see and observe on a daily basis without much thought. In reality, it is just a difference in culture. And there is nothing wrong with it. I believe we can further improve as a country but we also can’t deny who we are.

True wisdom only comes from knowing oneself.

Inside the mind of a psyCEO

When youhear someone being called a psycho, what comes to mind? That person is crazy or out of his/her mind, adeviant person? Yes, usually the connotation is derogatory in nature. But isbeing different always a negative thing?

About 2weeks ago, I have co-facilitated a Management Workshop for a big localpublishing company. I got so inspired by the CEO’s message, in fact I’ve writtendown some points which I think are worth-remembering. But the real message Igot behind what was being said during her whole opening speech was this- shewas clear about what she wants to achieve. She said “When I started thisbusiness, I wanted to help people, others wanted to help people one at a timebut I’ve always believed I am different and that wanted to help more people so,I chose media as my platform. Back then, I just wanted a small office somewherein the city but now we’ll be having a whole floor and who knows maybe soonwe’ll have a building but that’s just it, I do not aspire to become Henry Sy oranything like building malls. I know my limit.”

Anotheramazing CEO who got big in 2010 was Edgar Sia II; he was only 20 years old whenhe had his first taste of running a business after dropping out from college ofarchitecture. He said “My mind was always somewhere else”. He handled businessesof small hotel, laundry mat and printing press and soon after a food stall in aparking lot imposed such a tempting opportunity. Then, Mang Inasal (Mr.Barbecue) was born he said “I wanted to define a different category to fastfood industry by creating one that is not of American influence”. 8 years later,he sold 70% of it to a bigger and older Filipino fast-food empire, JollibeeFoods Corporation (JFC).

The ownerof Jollibee had a similar story. About 30 years ago he saw an opportunity toown a business and started as a franchisee of Magnolia Ice Cream Parlor. Andwhen Mc Donald’s came into the picture in 1982, some friends were telling themto get a franchise too. But truth be told, he refused because he wanted somethingelse. If you listen to the lyrics of their company hymn, you’ll know exactlywhat he wanted as the lyrics go “We will make the whole world say, the best isJollibee.” From a small ice cream parlorto a global fast food chain, JFC has truly gone a long way.

With allthese stories of success, one important lesson to be learned is that sometimes it’sjust okay to be called a “psycho”- to be different. Who knows you might be the next psyCEOgenius!

Believethat you have the capacity to be anything you want. And never ever be afraid tobe who you really are, no matter what others say you should be.

Sunset

I just saw one of the many magnificent sunset God has ever created today and felt blessed!

Ironically, it was the first time I appreciated heavy traffic on my way home. Because it gave me that precious 3-minute window of opportunity to capture the moment. A moment that seems to be God's way of showing a graceful bow after a great performance!

Last month, I met a girl on a friend's birthday party. I don't know how we came to talk about writing down 100 blessings per day for seven days project. But what she shared to me was really insightful. She told me, she did try to do this when she was so down. And it made her realize that the only reason she was feeling low is because she was focusing all her energy on the negative.


She encouraged me to try it too. Convinced as I was, I immediately tried making my list when I got home. I didn't realize it was difficult to list down 100 blessings every day for 7 days. I always end up at #30 or 40. Then eventually gave up doing my list. Until this moment came, I realized that every breath I take is a blessing in itself and that is definitely more than a hundred or else... =P

Every breath, every moment and every opportunity to appreciate life is a blessing. But it is up to you where you want to focus your energy to.

"If there is something in your life you don't want, stop worrying about it. The energy you put into it keeps it alive. Try to withdraw from it and it will likely go away" - Andrew Matthews, Happiness in a Nutshell

CROCO-BOTS

Let’s roll!

I was out for a long, almost 5 days get-away in the beautiful island of Palawan where love of nature grows in you as days pass by. We visited the best tourist spots the place has to offer which includes Honda bay, crocodile farm, baker’s hill and the famous underground river. It is my second time to be there but it sure feels like the first.

In transit to crocodile farm, our tourist guide was psyching up the crowd by telling exciting stories about crocodile farm; what we must see and what to expect. He also mentioned that there are really a lot of crocodiles in Palawan just like in Manila (referring to the corrupt city officials). We all laughed and agreed that there is some truth to what he said. Thinking about it, I came to a conclusion that in reality, no matter where you are in the world there would be some people who are greedy; whether for money or for power. But the bigger question is will you become one of them?

As Gandhi would put it, “be the change you want to see in the world.” In my 5 days stay in Palawan, I have seen that most people living there dare to be the change! Their system is quite impressive when it comes to tourism. Everything is centralized. The rates are standardized. So that, everyone gets a fair chance to make a decent living thru tourism. They have transformed their local tourism into an experience worthy being called “world-class!”

I saw and felt their culture of sharing thru their actions. Our guide even shared his tip from us to the driver even if we directly handed him the money. These few small gestures speak volumes of what the people of Palawan are made of. They are “croco-bots” upholding truth in all their endeavors.

Every day we must all strive to transform to be a better version of ourselves. And I’ve seen this work in them. Through this, it is my hope that we can make our country better; one city, one province or one person at a time. I encourage you to take the path towards a better you.

“Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.”- Optimus Prime

Of Emeralds and Rubies

Some years ago there was this game called "bejeweled" I'm not sure if you guys remember this game where you just have to match as many jewels of the same color together to earn points. It was an addicting game and I admit I have been bejeweled, like most of my classmates were, back in med school. Whenever we'd have to wait for our next class we would open our laptops and play as if it was a tournament.

One time inside the student council office, one of my co-officer was playing and I, on the other hand was sitting beside her supposedly writing my patient-doctor report. But of course, I couldn't help myself glance at her game and what's worst? I couldn't help myself giving her instructions as to where she could make a move. Good thing she's not the type who would get pissed or annoyed easily even if I was ruining her game. 

After she finished, one great idea popped out of my cerebellum and I told her with conviction- "You know this game is pretty much like our life, we face problems/obstacles and sometimes all we have to do is to take one step back to see the solution or have a good friend beside you to help you through." Then she told me with amusement "How in this world can you think of that when we're just playing a simple game? Where did that come from?" At that point, there was a 3-second moment of silence then a burst of laughter filled the small office which lasted for more than 60 seconds.

On my way home, I continued to contemplate on that very ordinary experience. If you think about it deeply, somehow it speaks of truth. Truth that in life there are several paths to problem solving.

1. Timing- some are resolved right away and some just needs more time
2. Perspective- sometimes we can easily see the solution with our own eyes but some needs another person's point of view
3. Last but not the least, when it's game over, we can always start anew

So don't despair when obstacles come your way. Life is like a game thus, we must ENJOY IT!

Switch

I am a self-proclaimed light switch destroyer!

The light switch inside my bedroom got busted a few months ago and I didn’t have time to fix it until last weekend. I tried to fix it a couple of times before but ended up with nothing because first, I don’t know how and second, I broke the newly-bought switch for replacement into pieces (not just once but yeah, twice) which I think is a bigger problem than not knowing how.

So there, I gave up fixing it. I didn’t notice the days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months without the main bedroom light. I just used the light in the bathroom to illuminate my path whenever I enter my room to sleep. I got used to it. In fact, I got used to it oh-so-much that 2 days after finally fixing the main light I still switch on the bathroom lights first!

The conclusion: Habits are formed and are difficult to break right away. Habits whether good or bad are stored in your procedural memory. Thus, it becomes automatic and needs no self-analysis of whatever sort. That is the danger of it. We sometimes don't notice our bad habits. If you have a bad habit, identify them today and make changes to form new and better ones.

Here's how in 2 easy steps:

The first step lies in the acknowledgment of the behavior. On the 3rd day, I was successful not to turn on the bathroom lights first because I knew and acknowledged the previous behavior. There was an effort to change what I usually do. However, the day after that... yes you guessed it right! I did it again! I ended up laughing out loud and realized the force of habit is really powerful. So I therefore conclude that I need more effort.

The final step is simple persistence and commitment. They say it takes about 21 days to form a habit. Only 21 days to change a certain behavior. So I commit to 21 days to change my habit. This story is quite simple but true. And I believe a lot of you have experienced this as well. There are a lot of things we do everyday that we wish we stop doing. Just like when you think you had stopped procrastination, overspending, nail biting, fidgeting and other mannerisms you developed over the years you sometimes catch yourself still doing it and feel guilty about it.

Why not start your 21 days of developing a new good habit today? Do it for success!

JUST QUIT!

Looking for something you lost or misplaced can sometimes get frustrating.

And it always happens to me.

I don’t know why but every time I organize my stuff I end up forgetting where I kept them. Sometimes it’s better put all my “daily” things on top of my desk to see them quickly.

But have you ever noticed that when you stop looking for a particular thing you lost or misplaced, it suddenly pops out from nowhere. And you wonder how come you didn’t see it when you were looking for it? Even if you already turned your room upside down. I haven’t found any article or scientific explanation on this extraordinary event, but I think it happens to most of us. Raise your hand if you agree! 

If the same principle applies to finding everything in this world, would you stop looking for love? According to Erickson's stages of development, at the age of 18-35 people naturally seek for  mutually satisfying relationships primarily through marriage and friends. To my aunts this is called the "marrying age" and you SHOULD get married. It is a must. Every reunion the first question they ask me is "when are you getting married?" If I answer, I have no plans yet. They will continue to probe and ask why. I'm sure some of you have experienced this once or many times now if you're still not building your own family. And because of this we sometimes feel pressured to find it.
 
A lot of people rant endlessly on why they couldn’t find their perfect match. They try to search for it, conform for it, and change for it and so on. But nothing really matters. Because there is a perfect time and place for everything as in everything! not just love. Your plans and your life will unfold and make sense. So don't be pressured but BE PREPARED.

So to all the single ladies & gentlemen out there put your hands up! And just quit finding it!

Let life surprise you.

BIG RED BALLOON

Here’s another unforgettable jeepney ride story.

I was on my home from duty way back in 2002, when I saw this cute little boy with his mother and baby sister riding the same jeep as I was in. The mom had a lot of groceries on hand while also carrying her baby girl about 3-4 months old. The boy was around 4-5 years of age and had a big red balloon that his mother secured by tying it around his wrists. After just few minutes, the boy fell asleep.

When it’s about time to go down the vehicle, the mother had a hard time waking up him up that we got stalled for several minutes. Almost everyone, including myself, got involved that we all tried to wake him up. Some called him by his name, some tapped his little arms and others even tried to bribe him with candy. But every single attempt failed.

"Red Balloon" Gouache Paint on Paper

Then, a witty young man shouted “Bata! Yung lobo mo lumipad!” (Kid, your balloon flew!). The boy immediately woke up and was ready to run after his balloon. A sudden burst of laughter filled the entire jeep. Some passengers continued to talk about the incident and shared a few more laughs after they went down.

What happened to the boy is known as “The cocktail party effect/phenomenon”. It is described as the ability to focus one's listening attention on a single talker among a mixture of conversations and background noises, ignoring other conversations. There exists a type of audio filter in our brain that selects which among all the stimuli needs to be responded to. The selection depends on how important or relevant the information to the person is. In this case, we know that the balloon was really important to the kid. And that motivated him to pay attention.

So tell me, what is that one most important thing in your life now that you can never do without? If you know the answer then you are lucky enough to have that strong, compelling “why” to continue on with everything that is you’re doing. If not, I suggest you try to find out now.

What's your big red balloon?

TINY COFFEE BEAN

I love perfume shops! 

(I know the title for this entry is tiny coffee bean, don’t worry we’ll get to that in a while wag atat! Haha you can erase that confused expression on your face now =P)

As the door opens, you are welcomed by a fresh flowery and a bit of sweet fruity combination of scents; an experience that’s nice to have every time! Choosing a perfume to buy is a tough job. There are just too many choices to choose from. And the longer you stay inside the store the harder it gets for you to distinguish one fragrance from the other. You soon develop adaptability to the scent. And the scent eventually becomes ordinary or plain even if it’s actually good.

Day in and day out our activities become a cycle. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between days. (Or was there any difference at all?) We develop adaptability to our routine. We sometimes lose that pleasurable feeling of excitement to life, like the feeling when we first enter a perfume shop.

In perfume counters, they usually have a small container of coffee beans. Never underestimate its size. It might be small, but it is enough to induce “reset” to the olfactory fatigue we experience when adaptability ensues. As in life, there are tiny coffee beans ready to help us “reset”; it could be a person, an event or a feeling like love that can change the way we see ordinary things.

Find your tiny coffee bean and see every day as if anew. Do something different now!

JEEP

It is dubbed as the king of Philippine's major thoroughfares; the most accessible & widely-used mode of transportation. This piece of colorful and unique machinery has graced the pages of several travel books and magazines all over the world. It has gone beyond just a public transport system but an icon of culture, which brings a truly unique Philippine experience!

Every time I see one, I'm always reminded of a particular incident happened to me in the past. [insert melodramatic music here] It was 6:45 a.m. at the Central station of LRT. I was running late for my 7 am final exam on Microbiology. So I rushed towards the street where the jeeps were waiting. As soon as I sat down in an empty jeep, the driver immediately blazed through Lawton to Espana. Usually drivers wait for more passengers before going. But this time it was different.

True enough we made it just right on time. To show my appreciation to the driver, I intended to pay him more than the usual. But instead of accepting my payment, he insisted to give my change back. Since I was in a hurry I didn't bother to count them. Only to realize later in the afternoon that he even gave me student's discount.

For sure not all jeepney drivers would do the same but I was fortunate enough to have met at least one. This experience taught me that there are still a lot of people around us willing to help without expecting anything in return.

From merely an icon of culture made of metal to an icon of goodness made of people with a heart. That's how I feel whenever I see a jeep today. I know somehow, somewhere there are few more good people around waiting for that one opportunity to show it.

So tell me, when was the last time you helped someone in need?

RED

Almost all stoplights turned red on me today.

What a way to start my day. I felt the frustration of waiting running through my veins. Every turn was a red stoplight. From EDSA, Makati Ave and Paseo de Roxas my timing was impeccable! I asked myself “WTH?! Did I wake up on the wrong side of the bed today?” I really don’t know.

The red light signaled me to stop. So I stopped and this came to mind. Red lights are like obstacles in our lives that has no other solution than to wait. Even if we wanted to do something about it, we simply can’t because there are other cars passing by. And it would be dangerous to run against the tide; someone could be really hurt if we force it.

After all, stoplights are there to keep traffic flow in order and to keep us away from deadly collisions. Maybe that is the very same reason why it is better to let go of things beyond our control. So that we won't be hurt. Sometimes we must just allow the traffic light of our lives give us the signal when to go, slow down and stop.

Then patiently wait for it to change colors once more.

7:55 AM

I arrived at exactly 7:55 A.M. today. Not bad for an 8 A.M. target.

Time is a valuable and irrevocable resource. In fact, as I turn the corner of the street to the parking lot I was surprised to see that 10 minutes already elapsed. It is comparable to singing 3 happy birthday songs or cooking instant noodles. But it sure feels like it was just seconds.

If time is money, I wonder how my financial statement would look like.

From this day forward, I will cherish every moment of my everyday because there is no replay button in real life. No matter how things turn out, I will choose to possess a happy and grateful heart that appreciates life in full circle.

SUN

The sun shined brightly today.

I felt the warmth of its embrace as I walk in the streets of Makati. It felt good to see the sun shine again after a week of pouring rain. Somehow it made me feel better and a little less melancholic. Suddenly my mood changed. I almost wanted to sing Kevyn Lettau’s Sunlight out loud where the lyrics go “I think about the morning and it warms my heart”.

It is amazing how certain things around us can affect us. How a small gesture of appreciation, thoughtfulness and concern could warm our hearts and make us smile, or how some trivial things make us sad. But ultimately, it is our perception of things that can make us feel the way we feel.

Then, I realized just like the sun we also have a certain effect on others. Good or bad we don’t have any control. And that is the hardest part of it all.